I caught my wife talking to another man and don’t know what to do.A few months ago I took my brother to a concert for a Christmas present.In Jan.She went out with some friends which I was ok with.I trusted her.She said this guy started talking to her.She said she told him form the start that she was married and he said he was to.Well he gave her his number.She said they talked on the phone a few times mostly about me and the kids and about his wife and kids.They went to lunch together once in the middle of the day at a fast food place.Now he called the other night about 9 and she missed the call.Didn’t answer it fast enough.I went get the phone and asked her who was that.She didn’t have to say anything the facial expression said it all.At first she denied it,I called her a liar and then she knew i knew and then told me the truth.She said it wasn’t nothing to due with trying to cheat it was just a friend to talk to.I asked why i was never told about him She said she didn’t want me to get mad.Now I am very hurt a Pissed off I am thinking about leaving,but I don’t want to hurt my kids.Should I try to trust her again.Its not the point she has guy friends.She kept it from me for almost two months. We have been married for 5 years and together for 9 years.
Every marriage needs rules and boundaries.
My husband and I have an ‘agreement’ to not form new friendships with the opposite sex. I am not talking about co-workers at work or stuff like that. But we don’t hang out or talk on the phone of the opposite sex. It opens the door to possible infidelity.
You can POSSIBLY work it out IF she stops all communication with this guy. If she has had sex with this guy, she will probably have a hard time stopping all communication with him. Also, she needs to understand that it is going to take you time to trust her again.
If you want to save your marriage then you should consider looking into marriage counseling.
Also, you two (if you are not already) need to go out on regular dates (around twice a month if possible), because once kids come in the picture, things do change and as husband and wife, it’s important to have regular dates to keep things fresh for a healthy relationship.
Best Wishes to you and Good Luck!
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She said he was “a friend to talk to”. So, what I think you should do is nicely ask your wife what you need to do in order for her to feel like you are her friend and that she can talk to you. And then listen well to what she says.
wow! I would be hurt if it happened to me. maybe you need to sit with her and have a serious talk, but be prepared that it may not go the way you hope.
i hope the best for you
yeah….if shes talking to a married man, shes looking for attention she and him arent getting from their spouse OR they are cheating on them. im sorry but i wouldnt accept or give my number to someone if im married…..thats a strike, second go out with him??? thats ridiculous why would i go have lunch with a man i met….second strike, third strike she denied and lied to you, thats very bad, thats a red flag. send her home!! find someone thaht truly deserves you and your love that will respect you.
She is just talking to him, don’t make it a big deal unless you see signs of cheating and actually see it with your own eyes. She is wrong for not telling you, you are her husband she should let you know whats new and whats not etc.. you are her partner in crime. I highly suggest counselling if you two cannot talk maturely about it.
If you have to tie up a dog to keep it, it is not your dog.
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this is exactly why she didnt tell you in the first place. you’re mad right now!! you just have to trust her. I think that’s just a friend.
She’s just talking… no big deal!